Apply

Apply, apply, apply
seductive mantra sings;
what if…
doubt creeps in
invisible, tangling words
tying my tongue,
a caring voice from long ago
worries at me,
don’t stick your head up,
crouch low, beneath notice,
stay out of trouble,
survive…

I want to climb a tree
and crow with the rooster
like yesteryear,
when the caring voice was too loud
fighting my sister,
by myself in the tree I could sit
and think untrammeled thoughts…

I breath, press numbers,
he answers, listens
then says, slow down,
I pause,
gather splintered thoughts,
tell my vision,
he says, don a confident mask,
and apply for that grant.

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3 thoughts on “Apply

  1. O, how well I can relate to this. It does take courage to write, to live, to get over the past, to face what ever you have to face with confidence even if it’s only half there. So well wordsmithed, M.! Bravo!

  2. This is what living on edge means. In 3 stanzas you have cast a spell. The 1st stanza about apprehensions while 2nd one shows nooks of retreats & shelters. The reassurance surfaces in 3rd and the scene is complete. Very compelling read. Wonderful.

  3. We are our own hero quest and that courage to drink from the trembling cup of self-fulfillment is daunting but freeing once we begin to sate our thirst for a love we draw from inside us…absolutely love the second stanza..reminds why I revel in love with my inner child…thank you for sharing…@blindedbeatpoet

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